widg‧et /ˈwɪdʒɪt/ [wij-it] -noun: Pointless ramblings from the New Forest. Obviously complete & utter Rubbish. Why must I contibute to all this endless talk about me? My self-indulgent knees, spilling themselves all over the internet. Obviously i am Jon and his hair, I AM HIM!

Thursday, February 08, 2007

How Much Ground Would A Groundhog Hog?

Punxsutawney Phil has spoken, just last week the wood chucking rodent told the world that he did not spy a shadow, honest, not me guv'nor. But, but, but, he is obviously a compulsive liar. Where is this early spring he has promised us? It's still bloody freezing! The innocent, warbling birds & daffodils may have been listening to the deceitful marmot, but now they've been smothered in a thick layer of snow. Or they would have been if the magic weather people hadn't been fibbing too. Where's my snow? Where is it, huh? I want it, I want it, want it! Waaaaaah!

More perfidious animal news. It seems those double-crossing kings of the jungle have decided to keep all their lovely chocolate to themselves. Yes, that is correct, the Lion Bar is to be withdrawn from our craving mouths. If it isn't bad enough that nasty Nestlé are aggressively shoving their powdered milk teats down poor African baby's throats, thus denying them the natural breastular equivalent, now they taking away the precious natural, feline treats from the crying, hungry children of the world.

I reckon the Swiss bitches stole my snow.

Currently listening: Rough Trade Shops: Counter Culture 2006


Blogger AlphIANo said...

Ned Ryerson?

11:52 pm


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